💎 Get clear on what YOU really want (not your friend or the media)
⚡️ Start taking action towards your goals from an INSPIRED place (not from shame or guilt)
👀 Learn to feel and OBSERVE your emotions (not fight them or drink them)
❓Reality-check question for my spiritually driven friends, empaths and creative souls…
who despite having done hundreds of yoga classes, therapy sessions and reading all the Eckhart Tolle books
…are still fighting against themselves and how they feel (while also NOT expressing the truth of what they really want)?
If there was a way to feel your emotions, express yourself FULLY and actually survive: would you finally allow yourself to realize your true dreams and desires instead of playing small, hoping that maybe one day the stars will align and something better will come your way?
Here’s why not managing your mind and emotions is not helping you:
❌ Every action you take in life is motivated by your internal state (aka your thoughts and emotions). You may be procrastinating over launching your blog or looking for another job because you’re too afraid of what other people think. You may be delaying having a tough conversation you know you need to have because you’re too afraid of upsetting the other person.
❌ Every day you spend ignoring your emotional life and mental wellbeing is another day that you spend feeling disconnected and separated from yourself and from the rest of the world. Disconnection, separation and playing small are NOT natural. We did not come to this earth to be in a state of contraction, separation and smallness. We came here to experience freedom and expansion.
The real question is: how comfortable have you gotten keeping everything inside?
Your ability to experience satisfaction, peace, success and freedom in life are highly related to your answer to this question.
Because if you know that life is meant for more than going to an okay job to make okay money so you can “buy things you don’t need to impress people you don’t like” (to use an epic quote from Fight Club)
…then keep reading.
Because I’m about to share something that maybe no one has told you before – because it stings 😬
But I promise: it will all make sense in the future, when you finally wake up feeling excited for the day ahead, being 100% clear that you’re a worthy, lovable and capable human being, knowing that even if you have a “bad” day where someone confronts you or criticizes you: you’re gonna survive and be okay, because you know how to take care of your emotions and mind to create a feeling of safety inside your body…
But first, let me know if any of these archetypes sound familiar…
All your energy is being taken by your job or business, mostly because you have a killer work ethic (if you’re an immigrant like I am, multiply this by x10). The sad thing is: you don’t really like your work anymore. You’re tired of having to dumb yourself down to play corporate politics or to bend yourself into a pretzel to satisfy your picky clients.Your dilemma is: should you stay in this situation, should you switch paths or just do a full reset?
You know your creative energy needs to be channeled into a business, side hustle, passion project or hobby. Ideas flow through you in the shower, while driving & during conversations with family and friends. It’s awesome, yet exhausting. Because here’s the thing: you only *say* you want to launch that blog or a business idea. But when are you gonna go from being a dreamer into being a doer?
You work and hustle all day. You may even have a family to take care of. You’re disciplined AF and love following a plan. After all, if it weren’t for your systems, you could not juggle all the things you currently do. But while you’re busy doing #allthethings and taking care of everyone else, your physical and mental health are taking a MASSIVE hit. How can you include a bit of self-care (guilt-free) without letting the boat sink?
And you’re not just an archetype: you are a unique human being with inherent worth, infinite value and a great capacity for expansion and learning.
Let’s get you crystal clear on what you really want, shall we?
⚡️ You deserve to claim back your time and focus on the things that light you up… even if it means revisiting your priorities.
😄 You deserve to feel excited every day when you wake up… regardless of how much money you have in the bank, how much you weigh or how many likes your latest Facebook photo got.
⭐️You deserve to do things that bring you joy and pleasure…even if it sounds “unrealistic” or “impractical”.
Here are the 5 reasons why your emotions seem to be all over the place:
Reason #1: Your goals aren’t really yours
You’ve been setting goals and doing things to impress other people: your parents, brothers, sisters, friends.
Deep inside, you live life based on what others think of you. Heck, you even worry what the neighbor’s dog thinks about you.
In this quest, you constantly worry whether you’re “normal”.
But here’s the truth: most people make choices on autopilot, unconsciously. When we look at “normal” in society for how to live our life, we lose our compass and our unique genius.
You must re-assess your “normal” and revisit your current goals and priorities if you want to live a life of freedom that’s fully yours.
Reason #2: You think that you should know it all
I feel ya. Asking for help is hard.
I know you’re NOT new to personal development and you know what the Deepak Chopras, Tony Robbins and Oprahs of the world say. If you hear one more time that the solution is to “love yourself more” or “only think positive thoughts” you’re gonna scream.
But here’s the thing: it’s one thing is to know a concept intellectually: it’s another one to embody it and feel it in your bones and soul. Working with someone with a different perspective, energy and toolkit can help you identify the blind spots that prevent you from going from “theory” to “embodiment”.
Reason #3: You’re not convinced of your inherent value
You give SO MUCH to others, constantly. You love being of service. You love being responsible and dependable.
But when you look at it deeply and honestly, you realize that you often do things from a place of fear and scarcity: “what if they think I’m not interesting enough?”, “what if I say something stupid?”, “what if they get mad at me?” “maybe I should call them to make sure we’re still good friends”.
On the outside, it seems like you’re taking loving actions. But the energy behind it is one of fear. So you say yes to things you don’t have the energy for, you disregard your real feelings about something because “we all need to compromise”, but then you feel drained and resentful, sometimes for days.
The problem is this: disregarding your feelings makes you lose the trust that you have in yourself. Being “fake nice” is like lying, and there’s so much lying we can do to ourselves before getting exhausted.
Reason #4: You’re not channeling your inner Madonna enough
By this I mean: you’re not Expressing Yourself clearly and specifically enough.
You think it’s “obvious” that other people should know exactly how you feel, what you like, what you’re up to… at all times.
You may say: “I rolled my eyes when my friend asked me about my dating life at brunch: isn’t it clear that I don’t want her asking me about that topic?” Well, no.
Communication and self-expression skills are a key component for improving your emotional life and mental wellbeing, so you can get experience more freedom in your life.
Reason #5: You’re using outdated tools
Imagine for a second that you’re Picasso and you want to create a masterpiece. Are you gonna use your brush that’s all worn out and has shed hairs? NO!
Similarly: you cannot take care of your mental and emotional life and live a life of satisfaction if you’re attached to using the same tools over and over.
Have you been doing “shadow work” for the past 7 years? Have you been seeing the same coach / guru or therapist for the past 5 years?
It’s not that certain tools are “bad” is just that they must be applied to a specific time and context.
Getting clear on what you want and improving your emotional life is possible…
If you’re reading this up until here, you already know that getting out of your head and expressing the truth of how you feel is key for your freedom, expansion and satisfaction.
By improving your emotional life, you can also:
✅ Achieve your health, finance and relationship goals with much more EASE because you will drop a lot of the drama that comes with unresolved emotions and conflicting thoughts
✅ Claim back your TIME as you will spend less time ruminating and feeling anxious, because you will be less afraid of feeling your emotions
✅ Take care of your BODY without feeling guilty, as you learn to implement routines, habits and boundaries that feel realistic to you. No more “30-day-detox-cleanses” you know are not sustainable. Progress over perfection is the rule around here
✅ Communicate your thoughts and feelings with confidence and CLARITY, knowing that if the other person does not get it, you will have tools to feel safe in your own body.
✅ Start implementing new habits and skills that will help you accomplish your dreams, EXCITED about the future, detached from the outcome and making sure you savour every step of the journey.
✅ You will feel less crappy / guilty / overwhelmed every single day, which in and of itself is important enough 😉
I’m thrilled to offer 1:1 life coaching sessions to help you “feel your feels” instead of ignoring them…
Here are the options for coaching together:
*Update 2020: Sliding Scale Pricing Available For Single Sessions
Bonus: get your specific question answered via monthly Q&A videos
As I am growing my YouTube channel, my clients get free extra coaching via Youtube!
As a client you get to submit your own very specific question every month for a chance to be covered in my monthly Q&A video 🙂 .
See what they’re saying.
I have coached people on weight loss, body image, business, relationships and habits. Regardless of the topic, improvement always starts when you quit fighting your emotions.
Thanks so much for the advice on my career. Your help is always amazing and super motivating
Krystina Z.Yoga Teacher
After doing tapping the other day I felt SO energized, it was pretty incredible. Thank you!
I’m picking better food choices and only realise it afterwards – then I congratulate myself! Ha! Yayyy me! I still have way to go but our session really helped bring it to my awareness and showed me what is possible!
I have noticed how I don’t react to many things like before. Crazy! Our work together along with therapy has been huge and I wanted to share that. Thank you!
Sonia used some amazing and effective tools with me that have allowed me to move past some habits that weren’t serving me. I highly recommend working with her
Anna Mae P.Life Coach
After coaching with Sonia, I realized that thoughts are optional and this has been one of the main teachings of my life. I hope to keep working with her and following her teachings
Camila S.Restaurant owner
Frequently asked questions about coaching
What happens in a session?
On the day of the call, we connect over Zoom. I prefer using video, but I respect your choice if you want to use audio only. We set an agenda at the beginning of the call, and then we start the coaching.
I use my intuition and experience to see which tool I will use with you (examples of tools include: NLP, EFT tapping, TIME techniques, Hypnosis, The Model by Brooke Castillo, The Work by Byron Katie or Human Design open centers questions).
However, please be reassured that I always ask your consent before using any tool, so you’re always in control of the session. You cannot be hypnotized without your consent and permission.
Remember: coaching is a collaborative process. I guide you, but you’re the one doing the work.
What results should I expect?
Most of my clients experience the results of coaching as relief (think of heavy weight lifting off your chest and shoulders).
So in other words: you’re going to feel better. You may have more patience, more peace of mind and more clarity around how you feel.
Your mind chatter and the self-critical voices usually quiet down or change into something more useful after a couple of sessions.
And to be really honest, when people start feeling their real feelings and observing their actual thoughts it’s normal to be freaked out a little bit and feel worst.
If you’re not used to these processes of “going into your own darkness” I really recommend you book the 3-month package so that you can feel supported.
Keep in mind that healing takes time and I don’t suggest that doing one or a couple of coaching sessions will “heal” you forever.
Healing is a process, a continuum. Our time together will help you. Every improvement counts. Every new tool expands you. But personal development, emotional freedom and spiritual work takes time, practice and a willingness to keep exploring.
How is this different from therapy?
While I am certified in Life & Success Coaching, NLP, EFT, TIME and Hypnotherapy, I am NOT a therapist or medical professional.
Coaching works best with people who are highly functional. If you struggle with daily living or have a specific condition that makes it hard for you to live, make sure you get medical help first.
Another important difference is that therapy is often focused on the past and healing past traumas.
In coaching, the focus tends to be on the future: what do you want to build or create next? How do you want to feel about it? How can we make that happen?
Which package should I choose?
If you’re new to coaching, personal development and emotional work, I suggest you take the 3-month package to really take the time to begin know yourself.
If you already have a good routine and set of practices that are working for you, but you wish to have my perspective for something very specific (e.g. a quick Human Design Reading, a custom EFT tapping script, or holistic business strategy) then a single session may be enough for you. Use your intuition.
Love this! But I don’t think I have the money now
To be specific, the truth is: you do have some funds. If you’re a human living in 2020, you have money, somewhere, somehow.
Now: where you’re spending that money on is another story. And that answer depends on what you value and prioritize.
You may be choosing to spend your money on entertainment (e.g. Netflix, Spotify…) or on your family (new clothing for your kid, family outing, etc.)
It’s NOT my place to tell people how to spend their money or tell them what they should do with their life. And I’m not making a claim that spending money on coaching is morally superior to spending money on entertainment.
I have a good portion of my budget that goes to hedonistic pursuits as well 🙂
However, my “coaching question” for you would be: are you really enjoying spending that money in the things you currently prioritize?
Because if you’re taking vacations, going to restaurants, or shopping for your kids because it’s what everyone else does, or because you feel obligated…. but inside you feel exhausted, drained or even resentful, then this is a sign that something is out of alignement.
In a situation like this, where you feel like no matter how many vacations, spa days and new shoes you get, you still feel like crap, then coaching could be a vehicle for helping you release those emotions and transforming them. So consider that 🙂
I’m in but I have one last question that it’s not here…
Send me a DM over at @iamsoniaortiz on Instagram.
OK, let’s do this! How do I get started?
If you’re booking the 3-month package: click on the book button to add the item to the cart. Upon completing the order, you will receive two (2) emails:
1) One email from Acuity Scheduling on my behalf containing your Order Receipt as well as the link to Schedule your first session.
2) One email from PayPal with a Receipt for Your Payment.
If you’re booking a single session: after you click on the book button, you will go straight into my scheduling tool. In there, you have to:
1) pick your time zone, 2) choose the next available date & time, 3) answer some brief questions to get to know you better and 4) pay online using PayPal.
After you complete your booking, you will get a confirmation email with the instructions for the day of the call and the Zoom link. Make sure you add our event to your calendar.
Still not sure? Here are 4 signs that you could use a coach…
Your current environment does not support your goals
Your partner or family are NOT huge fans of personal development. They tell you you’re just too sensitive or that you need to grow a thicker skin. If the people living with you make you feel awful: you could use a coach.
You’re starting to dread the “comfort zone”
You understand how privileged you are and how good it is to live a good life of comfort. However, if your routine of go to work-> make money -> spend money -> repeat is making you feel a bit dead inside: you could use a coach.
You struggle with PERFECTIONISM AND CONSISTENCY
You start more challenges, diets and projects than you actually finish. At the first sign of difficulty, obstacle or mistake: you want to quit or burn the whole thing down. If you’re a perfectionist: you could use a coach.
ANXIETY IS YOUR MIDDLE NAME
I have a soft spot for clients dealing with anxiety because it’s what I struggled the most with. Self-care that is realistic has to become your priority if you want to feel better. If you want a self-care routine that works for YOU: you could use a coach.
1:1 Coaching with Sonia is a good fit for you if you’re exploring one or more of these questions:
✅ How can I actually figure out what I want in life and my career and say it out loud?
✅ How can I launch my business or side hustle when I have so many ideas and so much energy all the time but zero focus?
✅ How can I incorporate simple healthy habits when I’m so freaking busy all the time taking care of everyone else?
✅ How I can express my thoughts and emotions instead of smiling and pretending I feel fine all the time without destroying my reputation?
✅ How can I achieve more work-life balance while still going after my ambitions and not becoming a lazy person?
✅ How can I set boundaries for my time and energy without feeling like an asshole for saying no to invitations or opportunities?
Why I Care
To be honest, a few years ago my life consisted of:
💻 Going to my IT admin assistant job never knowing when there would be another batch of layoffs.
🍺 Going to not so “happy hour” with the Android dev team (they were my BFFS) to continue bitching about work.
👽 Numbing out in front of Stranger Things, drinking the latest craft beer (like the good Montreal hipster I am), while dumping my work frustrations on my poor husband Jonathan.
I had a great corporate job which made me enough money to travel to Vietnam, buy the latest iPhone and even get tickets to Roger Waters shows…
But I was stuck in a wheel of consuming all the things (food, alcohol, shopping, YouTube), but always feeling empty and unfulfilled.
This in turn made me feel guilty. “I have it all, why am I still unhappy!?” was my daily question.
I knew wanted to become a creator of some kind and express myself fully. I just didn’t know WHAT to create or HOW to get started with speaking my truth.
I felt like I was living a double-life:
💅On the outside I would say I didn’t care what people thought of my appearance, but inside I thought that leaving the house without makeup was a crime
🙄On the outside I would say I wanted to start a business and share my ideas with the world, but inside I thought I wasn’t interesting or “polished enough”
😓On the outside I would claim I was body positive, but inside I felt guilty and unworthy if I overate or skipped a workout
Netflix, beer and complaint dates with friends provided some relief in the form of distraction…
But distraction does not get you to the root of the problem.
This is why I sought professional help in the form of therapy, breathwork, coaching and more…. And slowly but surely: my life expanded in ways I never thought possible.
Besides the internal transformation (which for me IS the real gift), I was able to launch my camper van rental business, get over my fear of doing video and speaking, and finally get certified as a life coach and create my own coaching style that mixes cognitive science + energy work + B.S free self-care strategies.
Regardless of whether you choose to work with me, I want you to remember that if you feel like your emotions are all over the place: you are not alone.
We were not taught how to manage our minds and emotions at school.
Most of the adults we met as children were living their own drama and probably did not know how to feel *their* feels (which is why they often criticized us or tried to change us or told us we were too sensitive 😛 ).
But now, as adults, it’s our job to learn the skill of “feel our feels” and express them in the best possible way we can.
If you feel drawn to my coaching style + vibe, I invite you to book a session using the links below or send me a DM on Instagram if you still have questions.
*Update 2020: Sliding Scale Pricing Available For Single Sessions